Overly expensive and ostentatious weddings – a problem in society especially in Marwari – Gujarati families
Nowadays weddings, especially in Marwari – Gujarati society, have become lavish events lasting 2-3 days, where there is no limit to expenditure and ostentation.
Root Causes: Peer pressure in society
Hype created by event managers, caterers, photographers, choreographers etc.
Calling expensive customs that have become popular recently as tradition
Such weddings have now become a means of showing economic prosperity, social relations and organisational capability
Harmful Consequences:
- Hard earned money of parents is wasted in tents, decorations, photography, choreography and catering
- Wastage of sound, light and food, which harms the environment and resources.
- Jealousy, inferiority complex and social comparison – especially for those who are living with limited resources
- The newly married couple does not get any solid capital or property
- Health problems due to competition to show off – heavy meals, staying up all night, mental stress
- Jealousy, inferiority complex and social comparison – especially for those who are living with limited resources
- Such events often lead to differences and estrangement in families
- Months of preparation of mental exhaustion and arguments – but the result is only fatigue
- Everything is forgotten after a few days – no lasting value, no lasting happiness
- ₹25-75 Lakhs in 1-2 day, if invested this money instead of spending extravagantly, it can becomes few crores in the time span of 10-20 years @ 12-15% return p.a. – which can secure the entire life of the couple.
Detailed steps:
- Introspect: Understand the difference between spending and pleasure. Prioritize capital building.
- Start a dialogue in the family: Talk to spouse, parents and children with an open mind.
- Discussion with extended family.
Meeting topic: Family discussion on adopting simplicity in marriages
Members present: All cousins and their spouses, maternal uncles, paternal uncles, aunts, elders etc.
Agenda:
- Consider a simple and meaningful marriage model
- Recognize the increasing expenses in recent marriages
- Discuss the economic, emotional and environmental impacts
- Reduce the numbers of food items and fix the maximum number of items.
- Promote unity and consensus
Minutes of meeting:
All agreed that ostentatious marriages have become a burden
Agreed that happiness comes from connection, not from spending.
All shared personal experiences.
Our friends decided to take this idea forward in their families.
Share the idea in friends circle and social circle and hold similar meetings.
Have the same discussion with your friends.
Discuss them and raise this question and solution in their social circle.
Respect to families who adopt simplicity.
Establish simplicity as a social value.
This chain should move forward to every family
Every spouse should share their ideas with their parents/in-laws and hold similar meetings.
From there, these ideas and decisions should reach the next families.
Let us move together: Collective awareness will change the culture.